I feel red.


Interactions cling like ivy,
And choke me out.


A pit in my stomach,
My insides glued together,
Tightness in my bones,
In my breath,
My chest.


Makes me want to crawl out of my skin.


So, I take happy pills,
To float away.
An impromptu trip to a better place.
A vacant space in my mind;
A purple room.


I land there softly, and everything melts.
A feeling I’ll keep chasing,
Until I’m dead.


I roll around and consume the colours,
Flying high and spinning out of control.
Euphoria, in between violet walls.


I don’t tuck myself in or try to escape.
I surrender to the movement, and flow.
I fold through the gaps and pour from the cracks.


No ivy leaves wrap around me,
I go down every path I want to.


Hour’s speed past me,
And still, I’m present.
My unrestricted inner world.


I exist just to be.


The lights fade.


The feelings evaporate, as I depart.


Now – how do I explain?


I feel red.
Raw, again.